the scientist and i have previously sounded-off on getting a haircut. i have always taken the position that it is best just to sit in the chair with your eyes closed and avoid conversation at all costs. well, i need to amend this rule. you see, it's not only important to stay perfectly silent while you are actually getting your hair cut, it's also very important to remain silent while waiting to be called back for your haircut. here's why...
i went to ye olde hair cuttery this evening to get my hippie locks trimmed. i am going home to visit the family this weekend and marty don't put up with any of that hippie business. there was a woman there with what i at first thought to be her two sons. after closer inspection, the one turned out to be a girl. now this mother was the type of mother that drives me crazy. she was totally absorbed in the conversation she was having on her cell phone. so much so that the two heathen/bastard children were running amok all over the hair cuttery. they were playing with all of the various brushes and jumping on all of the chairs, you know the ones that they can jack up. the employees were none too pleased about this.
as the demon seeds are terrorizing the store, a man walks in. he's carrying his bicycle helmut and wearing some short shorts...you know, the kind they wore circa 1980 when the scientist was created. in fact, i'm almost certain that he was created because of short shorts. but i digress. i immediately thought that something was off about him. well, my first impression turned out to be spot on.
after a while, this gentleman makes a comment about the demon children. at this point the woman beside me and i chime in saying that this is the kind of behavior that we abhor. that was all it took. this man ran away with the conversation. he went from talking about how his mother had her masters degree in social work from tulane (the best social work school in the nation) to how he new a jew, an actual jew from israel, that had a degree in psychology from the university of wisconsin. you know, in israel, all 18 year olds have to enlist in the army. this guy was a tank commander. he was the smartest man that crazy guy ever knew. crazy guy then went on to talk about his employment history and how he is collecting a government check. apparently the neurologist told him that he couldn't work anymore. i'm thinking he was certifiably crazy. anyhow, the conversation ended with him exclaiming that the muslims plotted to kill martin luther king, jr. why? because he was promoting equality of all men and the muslims do not believe that caucasians are their equals.
finally, i was called back. the employees apologized profusely to me. apparently this man has been in the store before. and yes, they were all playing games to see who had the privilege of cutting his hair.
and that my friends, is why you are to remain perfectly silent while getting your hair cut, whether you are in the chair or not.
A Place to Play
2 weeks ago