Better Late than Never

I was in Pittsburgh during the last week of March for a conference on crime mapping. I know, it sounds nerdy, but the colors are cool (eeewwwwhhh, shiny). Anyhow, after tooling around the city for a couple of days and nights with my coworker (with stops at the Duquesne Incline and the National Aviary), I met up with the Scientist and the Scientette at Church Brew Works (pictured below).


This was my first time at the particular establishment. It's on Liberty Ave., right near the Pittsburgh Brewing Company (where they make I'rn City). The Church Brew Works is housed in a deconsecrated church. As I found out, they make some delicious brews. I wonder if they use the menstrual blood of a virgin Christ. If so, does that make Jesus a pussy for menstruating? Anyhow, I digress. As I mentioned earlier, my coworker and I met the Scientist and Scientette at the brewery.


We sat in the bar area till we could get a table, all the while enjoying the beer. We were seated and began looking at the menu. Then Mala showed up!!!!!!!!!! Mala is seen below enjoying her cranberry ginger ale.


We ordered up some pierogies for appetizers and then set at picking our main courses. They brought everyone's food out, but somehow forgot to bring mine. Nay, scratch that. They forgot to make mine. I waited a good 10-15 minutes until they brought it out. I was offered free dessert, but I didn't want that. Instead they took a beer off the tab, which happened to be the Scientettes. Oh well, no biggie. So then we headed back to the Scientist's pad. Julia refused to let me take her picture. I tried in the one below, but all I got was this beautiful head-shot of Bochman.


I tried again without much luck.


So we got back to the apartment. Matt and Julia went to remove their coats and Mala went to the bathroom. I went into the living room to take a load off. When I entered the living room, a fucking bird came flying at me. I screamed. I ran. I told everyone there was a bird in the apartment. No one believed me. I guess being an habitual liar has it's disadvantages. So the bird made it's way into the kitchen, flying from the refridgerator to the sink and then back into the living room. I immediately picked up the ol' camera and tried to get this on film for posterity. Below is what I was able to get. The bird is one of the black blobs inside the red circles. I'm not sure which one. It was flying every which way and it was hard to get a good shot.


Julia, being all level-headed and shit, retrieved a towel in which we would ensnare the little beast. The damn thing was pretty fast though. Somewhere along the line, I should note, Mala locked herself in her bedroom. Smart woman.


So after we chased it around the living room for a while, the bird ended up in the Scientist's bedroom. We closed the door. We had it trapped. At this point, we each had a towel. The bird was zipping around the room. Matt and Julia were on the bed trying to catch it, I was standing in the middle of the room turning in circles. Matt and I, if I remember correctly were laughing our asses off. Then the damn thing got wedged between a desk and the wall. It wouldn't move. I rummaged on the desk and found a candle (a long thin one, I should note....wasn't there a candle scene in Debbie Does Dallas? I digress). I poked at the bird until it started towards me, then I retreated screaming. Finally, Julia cornered the bird on the desk and wrapped it in the towel. We ran downstairs and she released it and then proceeded to scream her head off and run back up the stairs. Matt and I looked at each other in bewilderment.

After this excitement, we proceeded to lay around chinkin' beer and watching the tube. All in all not a bad night.

I did in the end though, get a picture of the Scientette. I left the red-beady eyes in so that everyone can truly see that she is a devil-woman.



The end.