Wednesday, March 07, 2007

The Teacher

Apparently, Jared sold you out, so here I am with a new post...

If there's one thing that's readily apparent of the staff here at Dr. Yeti, it's that we're lazy...very, very lazy. That's why we like to invite guest bloggers like our field man Dr. Snail to write stuff whenever they can; it saves us work.

In that vein, I'd like to introduce you to The Teacher. The Teacher is an old friend of The Scientist and could very well be in charge of your child's education. Apparently, some people don't like it when someone attempts to enlighten their kids though:
From: RetardedParent@dbag.com
Sent: Saturday, March 03, 2007 6:43 AM
To: Teacher, The
Subject: I'm Concerned About The Kids

You are a monster. You are ruining kids lives over stupid shit like literature that only a person like your lame ass would need for their future. Literature is retarded, when will you need it unless you teach it or get a question on jeopardy or some crazy shit like that. My daughter has good grades in every class but your literature class, and I think it is bull shit. You are a disgrace to society and I wonder how people like you get to teach such meaningless and ridiculous subject matter to todays youth. i bet George bush hates books, and he runs the country. Of mice and men, grapes of wrath, the red badge of courage, the scarlet letter, where can i stop, its all retarded. You better think about how stupid your teachings are before you ruin someones chance at college over something as ridiculous as literature.

Please let me know you recieved my e-mail

Mr. Retard
Wow. I guess it doesn't take much for the Tard Family here to get riled up. Some people might agree with the monster comments because The Teacher is directly responsible for the death of Owen Hart (and at least one hobo), but being a monster for trying to educate some ignorant-ass kid is hardly legit. And I like G.W. as much as the next guy that doesn't give a shit about anything, but connecting his hatred of books with your kid's stupidity doesn't seem like a smart move to me.

But what do I know? I'm just a highly educated person that reads for pleasure, can wear shoes with laces instead of velcro, and whose parents aren't brother and sister...

11 comments:

the yeti said...

i must ask, is that letter for real?

Dr. Yeti said...

Amazingly, yes, it's real. I only changed the names and email addresses to avoid legal complications and shit.

Like I told Dr. Snail, if the guy had just threw the word "taint" in his rant, he could be writing for us full-time.

SwampThing said...

Wordz be stooopid. Books ar dum.

Dr. Snail said...

Everyone knows books are for burning, not for lookin' at.

Dr. Yeti said...

Books do give off a lot of heat. I burn them instead of logs when I'm camping to keep warm and cook meat.

Anonymous said...

I burn Stephen King novels

Dr. Yeti said...

You, sir, are dealing with mysterious forces that will ultimately destroy you.

The Teacher said...

Wow, seven fantastic (yet slightly off-topic) comments! About me (sort of)! Yeah! I'm famous!

Dr. Yeti said...

I'm told that other literature teachers have printed out the blog post and passed it around their English departments. You're definitely famous!

Anonymous said...

Those mysterious forces may very well destroy me but not until I destroy several copies of "Dark Tower", "The TommyKnockers", "The Green Mile" and "Dream Catcher". I'm saving "The Stand" for a harsh winter's night.

Dr. Yeti said...

That's a pretty sensible rationing plan.