I've needed a haircut for a month and a half (at least). I mean, I've needed one bad. My hair grows so fast that it's retarded. It looked like I had roadkill on my head for x-mas. I've got to give Julia credit for even staying with me through this trying ordeal.
I made one attempt to get the hair trimmed before New Years, but Super Cuts was packed full of people. I took one look in the window, gave some geek the stink eye, and high tailed it to Giant Eagle instead. Yesterday, it was much the same, but I called and got an appointment tonight.
Usually, some old foreign lady cuts my hair there. She doesn't understand a word I say, and I just smile and nod whenever she babbles anything. Oh yeah, and she tries to wipe off or cut my devil eyebrow every time. Kill!
Anyway, things were different tonight. Yep, instead of the foreign lady, I got the old gay dude. He touched me a lot, whispered, "Close your eyes," into my ear when he was going to blow the trimmings off of me, told me a story about a thieving whore, and gave me ONE HELL OF A HAIRCUT! Those gay dudes really know what they're doing; my head doesn't look like an ass anymore.
I feel great. It's like I'm a new man whose brain can breathe. I feel like Seacrest did when Dick Clark fudged up the New Years Eve countdown and he realized the the job was his now...except my haircut's better.
A Place to Play
2 weeks ago